EP 1. HUSBAND AND WIFE, WAYS HOW NOT TO KILL EACH OTHER

EP 1. Baby, you should do some exercise for your cute belly...

Big part of our life revolves around establishing control over our lives, whether it is our health, insurance, education, saving money, choosing a partner. We have to come in peace with the fact that wanting to control, and resisting control is in our nature. But, when we try to control the partner, the situation only gets worse, because partner naturally resists the control.

So, where is the best place to aim our need for control? Up on us is to establish control on ourselves. When we, as partners, look at our marriage from the side, what kind of relationships we want to have in our family, what we want to built, it all makes us lose that need to control each other. We start controlling the environment in which we can feel safe, and nurture the relationship we want to have. Only when we give up controlling each other to change, things actually start to change.

Paradoxical theory of change (Gestalt), when we accept who we are, and stop resisting the change, then is when we can change. As we accept who we are, that is how we should love and accept what our partner has got from nature as well. When there is mutual acceptance, a safe environment is established for more growth...

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